I don’t think anyone will read this, but I still feel a weird nervousness? Like I have to impress someone, or show that I’m a cool and interesting person. I am, but don’t worry about that right now.

I figured this is a good place to finally gather my writing and book stuff into one place. Maybe put a thought or two to text if I am feeling funky. I stopped using most social media a few years back (save for Tumblr but I feel after last week’s disastrous update it’s only a matter of time before it joins the ranks of the unusables) and I really do miss doing my little book posts and reviews. I just cut socials out one by one feeling more and more “old man yells at cloud” each time. Reviews that were covert ads, short form videos every fucking where, these things were all terrible, sure- but the nail in the coffin for every app I deleted was seeing posts from people I don’t follow. Why on earth would I want to see recommended posts? I didn’t ask for that. I use the internet for a specific reason and it just turned to algorithmically generated goop so gradually that when I finally had enough I had forgotten that there used to be a point to all this.

I also really don’t like being shown videos that I haven’t been sent on purpose or sought out on my own. I’m glad some people get joy yapping / being yapped to in bite sized chunks but it isn’t for me. Bring back the written word as the primary format online, please god. Strange and lengthy chunks of text has always been the native tongue of weird ladies in their 30s.

Back when I was a teenager in 2009 I had a WordPress blog that I posted on constantly. This was back in the day when bloggers ruled the world- I lived in Sweden and remember checking Kissie or Blondinbella’s blogs with my friends every day in the school library. Even us, the emo kids, would look at their latest party pics and be inspired to update our pages with whatever Tim Burton nonsense was going through our Crazy Coloured little heads. Oh, the joy at refreshing a friend’s blog and a new post popping up timestamped just now. Or did you ever find the blog of someone you had a crush on! Seeing a comment on a blog of a mutual of a mutual who you were stalking and stumbling into their personal world was like finding the holy grail. I liked a trenchcoat commie with whiteboy dreads and I thought his page was the deepest, most profound writing I had ever seen. Anyways. I don’t know where I am going with all of this. I suppose I just miss it? It felt real.

Oops got a bit Dr Complainathon there, I really don’t mean to come at all this from a negative place. I’m excited to find like minded people and spaces, and try to give my time online a point again. I want to refresh a blog and get excited to see a new post, and not because I was notified in real time.

That feels like enough of an intro for now. I’ll sign off as Lamb – it’s a family name, but soft and blurry enough to that it doesn’t feel like i am just pretending to be someone new.

Do chara,

Lamb